Oral History Program Viviana Felix Interviewed by Sara Mathewson & Sarah Storey 10 June 2019 Oral History Program Weber State University Stewart Library Ogden, Utah Viviana Felix Interviewed by Sara Mathewson & Sarah Storey 10 June 2019 Copyright © 2022 by Weber State University, Stewart Library iii Mission Statement The Oral History Program of the Stewart Library was created to preserve the institutional history of Weber State University and the Davis, Ogden and Weber County communities. By conducting carefully researched, recorded, and transcribed interviews, the Oral History Program creates archival oral histories intended for the widest possible use. Interviews are conducted with the goal of eliciting from each participant a full and accurate account of events. The interviews are transcribed, edited for accuracy and clarity, and reviewed by the interviewees (as available), who are encouraged to augment or correct their spoken words. The reviewed and corrected transcripts are indexed, printed, and bound with photographs and illustrative materials as available. The working files, original recording, and archival copies are housed in the University Archives. Project Description The Beyond Suffrage Project was initiated to examine the impact women have had on northern Utah. Weber State University explored and documented women past and present who have influenced the history of the community, the development of education, and are bringing the area forward for the next generation. The project looked at how the 19th Amendment gave women a voice and representation, and was the catalyst for the way women became involved in the progress of the local area. The project examines the 50 years (1870-1920) before the amendment, the decades to follow and how women are making history today. ____________________________________ Oral history is a method of collecting historical information through recorded interviews between a narrator with firsthand knowledge of historically significant events and a well-informed interviewer, with the goal of preserving substantive additions to the historical record. Because it is primary material, oral history is not intended to present the final, verified, or complete narrative of events. It is a spoken account. It reflects personal opinion offered by the interviewee in response to questioning, and as such it is partisan, deeply involved, and irreplaceable. ____________________________________ Rights Management This work is the property of the Weber State University, Stewart Library Oral History Program. It may be used freely by individuals for research, teaching and personal use as long as this statement of availability is included in the text. It is recommended that this oral history be cited as follows: Felix, Viviana, an oral history by Sara Mathewson & Sarah Storey, 10 June 2019, WSU Stewart Library Oral History Program, University Archives, Stewart Library, Weber State University, Ogden, UT. Viviana Felix Circa 2018 1 Abstract: The following is an oral history interview with Viviana Felix, conducted on June 10, 2019 in the Stewart Library, by Sarah Mathewson. Viviana discusses her life, her memories, and the impact of the 19th Amendment. Sarah Storey, the video technician, is also present during this interview. SS: Okay, it is June 10th, we are at the Stewart Library. We are here with Viviana Felix being interviewed by Sara Mathewson and Sarah Storey is recording. SM: Where and when were you born? VF: I was born in California and I don’t remember the city but it’s called Duarte I think, I just grew up in El Monte. I was born June 13th, 1990. SM: So where did you end up graduating from high school? Was it still in California? VF: So as a child my mom moved around a lot and we ended up in Utah when I was about seven or eight years old; we had family here, so my mom was like, “Well, we’re just going to stay here.” I’ve been here since I was seven years old, in Utah. I also moved a lot within Weber County so I graduated from Roy High School. SM: So growing up as a young girl, who were some of the women that you looked up to? VF: You know what? That’s an interesting question because I even ask myself now as an adult, like, “Who are those role models or mentors that I look up to?” And I don’t think I have one in specific but I think I have many because there is many 2 women that have different traits that I like and I hope to adopt into my own skill set and so there’s no one particular woman but I had many as a child growing up in Utah. And the first one that I can remember is my eighth grade English teacher, Ms. Hatch, who was the one who introduced me to Mexican-American literature and then just getting to know that like she was from New Zealand and like having her immerse her culture within our English class, so I thought that was very cool and I liked how she was able to bring her own culture into the classroom setting. So that was one of the first mentors that I can remember as I was growing up, like in high school I had other teachers and other people that I looked up to. And then, now as an adult there are many women that I look up to: politicians, entrepreneurs, teachers, educators. There’s no one person but I think there are many that I like what they have and what they bring to not only me but other communities. SM: Were there any women along the way who you’ve still stayed in touch with who kind of helped you through college and just kind of assisted you with what you had going on at the time? VF: Yeah, I keep in touch with a couple of them. So one of them was Adrienne Andrews who works here at Weber State. I remember when I started getting involved with student leadership she was my first advisor in that role, in that capacity, and so she was definitely a huge influence in the foundation of my leadership. And then once I got to junior and senior year, I met Carol McNamara, 3 who also used to work here at the Walker Institute and she also was a huge influence on how I got leadership opportunities and internships and stuff like that. SM: How do you think the role of mothers has changed? Because I think it’s more acceptable for women to be more involved in the workplace. VF: Oh my gosh, I love that question. It’s very interesting because coming from a Mexican home and just culture. So I grew up in a single-mother household, it was just my mom, my brother, and me, and there was a strong woman in our home. And so I look at that now as an adult and I really think that a lot of my character came from that, a lot of stubbornness, and not asking for help, and doing things on my own, and figuring out the answers and solutions, I feel like it came from that. And even though we have an extended family, it was always the female who was the one that said yes or no to things. But then at the same time, you can feel this pressure of the culture of just being, you know...I don’t want to say subservient but, you cater to the man’s needs and so even as a child you’re told to take a plate of the meal to your grandpa or to your uncle. Because they can’t come to the table and grab their own? So things like that. Then looking at mothers, my mom, she worked twelve hour work days and her and my aunt, they took turns because she was also a single-mother and so one of them would watch us during the day and the other one at night. And so I think the role of mother, although it’s very nurturing and very present in the child’s life, I think I definitely experienced a very different way of being mothered to than other friends in elementary school. So I think now even, friends or co-workers that are having children, I don’t have any children of 4 my own but they have children and they’re asked by their Mexican moms, “Are you going to stop working because now you have children?” And they’re like, “No, I still want a career, I still want to go on that track.” And so I think it’s very interesting growing up in this culture where moms and women have always been in the household and the man has always been the breadwinner. Like with my generation seeing that switch and change where I make more than my husband and we’re fine with it and it’s okay in our household. We share household responsibilities, we each clean the home and cater to different needs in the home. And so I think it’s interesting that now the older generation hears that and they’re a little appalled, you know, of how the household works there. But it works for us and I think that’s the way it needs to be because even now with younger nephews, they need to know that it’s okay if you like to clean or if you want to listen to that feminine side of your brain and nurture and care for children, because that’s totally fine. But I think growing up, there was definitely gendered roles. Like my brother, he did the dishes ‘cause that was more “masculine” while I had to do the bathroom ‘cause that was what a girl did, and so I don’t know where these roles came from, but I even look at my brother and just him having the ability to do laundry or clean a bathroom, I think that’s something that maybe my dad or my step-dad wouldn’t have done. So mothering and being a mother and just that role I think is changing but it’s changing very differently in different cultures. 5 SM: I wasn’t sure what your family dynamic looks like but you said that you don’t have any children, have you still felt any words of criticism or judgement for pursuing your career, even though you don’t have kids? VF: Oh my gosh, I was just talking to a coworker about that. So I’ve been told by my family, at church—me and my husband, school has always been a priority, and creating a career, and a stable economic foundation for our household. But listening to my cousin say—for Easter we have a five-year-old and then a one-year- old and then the gap jumps all the way to ten, so there’s a big gap of children missing for Easter egg hunts, and so they’re like, “We know you Millennials want a career, this and that, but we really need babies in this family for family events.” And I’m like, “How is that on me or myself?” But things like that. And then at church, yesterday this lady, she’s like, “Oh, you know, are you guys going to have children?” And we’re like, “Oh, we don’t know, we still have time,” and she was like, “Oh yeah, you’re so young, you know, give it a couple years,” and I’m just like, “Thanks for giving your opinion on my timeframe,” you know. But it’s very interesting just to get that, and I think, even a while ago, I had a conversation with my mom and I was like, “You know what? I feel comfortable being an aunt now that my brother has like his first child and I love being an aunt. But I don’t know if children are the thing for me,” and she freaked out, she’s like, “No, you have to have one of your own, I need a grandchild of yours,” blah, blah, blah, and I was just like, “I can adopt, there’s other options,” and she’s like, “You need to at least have one.” And I have never had that conversation with my mom 6 so that was very surprising to me, and I even went back and talked to my husband and I was like, “That was really weird,” and I was like, “But I mean it didn’t change my mind because it’s still whatever I want to do, whenever I feel ready, whenever we’re there”. SM: So were there certain people who encouraged you to pursue an education? VF: Oh yeah, my husband. A hundred percent, hands-down. We didn’t get married until after I was done with my Bachelor’s degree because he didn’t want a wedding or anything to interfere with my education, undergrad. And then with my Master’s degree, we had talked about children but I’ve never been a hundred percent there, but he’s like, “Whatever happens, we’ll do it after your Master’s degree.” And so it’s always been my education first for him, which I really appreciate because he has kind of pushed me into that direction, whereas maybe if I’ve never met him, like my mom said, I’d probably be a supervisor at a manufacturing company and who knows where I would be, maybe with five kids, my husband makes fun of me like, “You’d have five kids.” And so I definitely feel that him in my life was definitely a different track that I maybe wouldn’t’ve hopped on if it wasn’t for him knowing the importance of having a woman of color, an educated woman of color, in the workforce, I don’t think I would’ve gone that direction. SM: Did any of your family members encourage you to pursue an education? VF: So I come from a family who didn’t get much education. So my mom, herself, she did a technical degree in, you know, beauty salon and even before that, in 7 Mexico, she got her degree in secretarial studies. My father barely finished middle school and so education wasn’t something that was kind of talked about, like you had to do good in high school and middle school and all of that, but like after high school? Nobody had really talked to us about anything, and ‘cause we always struggled financially, we were poor, we struggled to meet, you know, rent and stuff like that; and so for her priority was that if I got my high school diploma that would set me up well in the workforce to have a higher paying job, and that was like back in 2008. And so that was her train of thought. And when I was in my senior year of high school, colleges came and talked to me, I got a scholarship at the tech college for full-ride and stuff like that, but I never really looked into those because I started working as soon as I turned sixteen, and it was always to help my mom because we weren’t in a position where we could, just not have me work. Like we needed that income to help. And so yeah, education after high school, I never thought about until I met my husband in my senior year after I graduated and then that’s when I started thinking about it and then I enrolled in Weber State in 2009. SM: What did you major in? VF: I majored in Sociology. SM: So what career options did that provide you once you had your degree? VF: I didn’t know and I was freaking out ‘cause I didn’t know. I was like, “What am I going to do?” I tried to look at criminal justice, I tried to look at political science, and none of those were quite the fit for me and so when I came across sociology 8 I loved it ‘cause it was just so broad and a lot of these other topics actually fell under sociology and so I was like, “I’m just going to do that.” But then, I think it was my junior year, I was like, “I need to do an internship, I need to do something,” I was getting all this great experience with student leadership and involvement and like other clubs on campus but I hadn’t really done anything to set me up for after college graduation and so I was looking at—and that’s when I met Carol, through a class that she was teaching, and she encouraged me to apply for an internship and I applied for it, I got it, I got to intern in Washington D.C. And then I came back and I’m like, “Okay, I’m ready,” just finish my year, graduate in December, and start looking for a job. And then she’s like, “No, stay on for another semester and do the state legislative internship,” and I was like, “Oh, can I do that?” She’s like, “Yeah,” you know, ‘cause I was done already. And so I did that, she got me a scholarship to pay for like that semester and so I did the internship, ended, and then I graduated that spring. But I think if it hadn’t been for her, I knew there were resources on campus but I didn’t feel welcome to some of those resources, and so just being able to make that one-on-one connection with her really allowed me to put myself out there and accept the challenge to apply for these internships, and regardless if I got accepted or not, at least I tried. And so I think that was helpful. At least helpful in creating an idea of what I wanted to do for afterwards, or at least built something so that I could take that out into the workforce and been like, “Okay, this is what I’ve done.” And see, so my major was sociology but I’ve always had an interest in politics and just law and things like that, my minor was pre-law and 9 so I had to take a lot of political science courses and that’s where I met her. And I think having a complementary minor to maybe a major that you’re not sure what you’re going to do with it, but that’s what you want to do, really helps. I mean, I didn’t think about it that way but it did eventually help a lot, at least to connect me with people that knew things that I didn’t know. SM: What were some of the challenges that you faced while you were obtaining your degree? VF: I think some of the challenges here at Weber, is just navigating. I mean, I look back on my first year here and I was one of those commuter students where I just came and left and went to work. And so making like connections with other people that looked like me was very important because that led me into an involvement level that I really never thought that I would do—like I always thought just school, work, school, work ‘til I’m done.—So being able to connect with them was important so that I could kind of develop my own leadership skills in other areas. But I think that was hard because in a lot of my classes it was just a lot of white, it was white men and women, and my professors were white men and women, so I really felt disconnected as a woman of color—as a student of color—in a lot of my classes, especially at the beginning. And so that was intimidating. You second guess yourself, “Should I be here?” like, “I’m not smart enough,” like, “Why do I keep failing on this subject?” And so I think—even as a first generation you get a lot of that and it’s hard, you know, to navigate a system that your parents didn’t know how to navigate to nobody in your family knows 10 how to navigate. And so I think Weber is a great institution, I love it here. But there are other things that as an individual you deal with to overcome, to get to a comfort level where you feel like you can navigate an institution, you can talk to other people, you can join clubs, you can become a leader, essentially, on campus. SM: You talked about second guessing yourself and being unsure of what you were going for here. Did you feel like a lot of that was just what was going on inside you or did you ever feel that from outside influences? Maybe from people or like fellow students or professors here? VF: I think a lot of it had to do with the environment. So a lot of the environment that I was in, these classrooms, dealt with me fighting myself and my conscious of like, “No, you’re here. You belong here. You need to get an education.” But I definitely feel like the environment has an influence on how I felt about myself, whatever that looked like was out of my control and everybody else’s control, but it did have an influence on how I viewed myself in that setting. SM: So what was your first job? VF: I worked in telecommunications. I think that’s what they call it now, I don’t know, it was one of those call centers. Yeah, we don’t have it here anymore but it was Convergys. Yeah, that was my first job, a call center. SM: Yeah. What was your first job out of college? Once you had your degree. 11 VF: Out of college? Well, I had a job that rolled over ‘til after college, I worked in retail, but my first, I say, official job that I got with my degree was actually with Ogden City. SM: What did you do for them? Like, or what are you currently? VF: So for Ogden City, my title there is Diversity Affairs Officer and I work under the mayor and the chief administrator officer. To kind of just know what’s going on in the community and bring that back to the administration, as well as taking information and resources from the City out into the community so that they’re aware that those are available for them. SM: So how many years have you been there then? VF: It was three years in January, so like three and a half. Yeah, so before I got this position—it’s a brand new position, nobody had ever been in this position before. So I went into this position not knowing what to do, who to talk to, who to connect with, and so I kind of just got a list and they’re like, “Here’s a list of people we want you to talk to,” like, “do that and then we’ll come and talk about it in a little bit or once you’re done,” I was like, “Okay.” So I really got to mold and shape my job into what I want it to be or what I wanted it to be. So that was interesting and hard both at once, but I think in the end it’s been very flexible and I haven’t really had any limitations to it, which I appreciate, because as a recent graduate wanting to go into the workforce, first time with like an official degree in the workforce, you know, how do I put that to use? And so I was lucky that I knew people here at Weber State that could guide me and I 12 made new friends and met new people in the community that were also able to help me give it a form and what I should actually focus on so. SM: Did you like to be able to take the reins a little bit? Just because it was a new position and you were figuring it out and molding it like you said? VF: I’m going to be honest, no. It was scary, it was super scary. Because here I am, I think how old was I, like twenty-five-years old, recently graduated, have never really been in a position like that. I’ve been an intern where you’re told what to do not, “Tell us what you want to do,” you know? And so it was, I was scared because I’m like, “What if I like go one direction and they’re like, ‘Oh, we didn’t hire you for that.’ Or what if I started doing this thing, like certain things within the community, and releasing this certain type of information and then it’s like, ‘Oh no, that’s not what we envisioned for you.” But I’ve been very lucky in that they’ve been very open and they’ve accepted everything that I’ve had to offer thus far. And so yeah, it was scary. Because they had no idea what they wanted to see or what they wanted to do and here I am brand-spanking-new in this position that nobody had ever been in before and so, yeah, it was scary. But it worked out, I’m here three and a half years later. SS: How did you find the position? Because it was brand new, was it just an advertisement you applied for or did you know somebody that created the position around you? VF: No. So I found out—I got an email from Carol I think and she’s like, “Hey, you should look at this and apply for it,” and I was like, “Okay.” And you know, I didn’t 13 love my retail job and I knew that’s not what I wanted to do and I knew I didn’t go to school for that and so I was like, “Okay, I’m just going to give it a shot,” and so I applied for it, and I want to say it was like September and I didn’t hear and I didn’t hear from them and I didn’t hear from them and it was like the end of October and I saw Adrienne and she’s like, “Oh, did you hear about this position? You should apply for it.” And I was like, “I did but I haven’t heard from them,” and they’re like, “Oh, let me introduce you to so-and-so so that, you know, ‘cause he’s going to be looking at the applications,” so I was like, “Okay.” So here I am and introduced myself and said, “Yeah, I applied. Blah, blah, blah, blah,” and then I get called for an interview in November and then I got the job in December. Yeah, it was definitely because people were watching out for me—Well, I don’t know if they were specifically watching out for me but I think they had me in mind when they saw that position. SM: Because you were kind of taking the reins and this was a new position that you were filling, did you have any issues with people invalidating you in your position? VF: ‘Cause you’re young or inexperienced, like a kid. I get told I’m a kid, I’m like, “I’m going to be thirty next year, like what are you talking about?” SM: Did you feel like, “Hey,” like, “I shouldn’t have to speak so loud for y’all to pay attention here.” Have you felt any of that? VF: Oh, I still do. Yeah. It’s, I mean, I think going into my position especially with a title like Diversity Affairs Officer, people were scared, they’re like, “What is that? 14 Why do we need that and I was just like, but I got that a lot especially because politics, it’s all old, white, men. Like I love my senior leadership team but they’re all retirement-age, white, we don’t even have one woman, like one woman. And so it’s hard going in, especially when you’re a person of color, it’s even harder. I mean, that’s what I did my whole entire thesis on is like women of color in these positions and like the struggles that they go through. So yeah, you get a lot of microaggressions, you get a lot of invalidation, you get a lot of second-guessing, you know, yourself and people second-guessing your abilities, but I think the one thing that has kept me there is like my need and want to see that atmosphere, that environment, change and be more open and acceptable of what our community actually looks like. And so, I mean, the people there, we have amazing people, but again, you know, you’re talking over generations it’s stayed the same and now, like Millennials are more than Baby-Boomers in numbers, right?. And so I think I got sexism my first year a lot, I got racism from other employees, so yeah it’s hard breaking in a new position, especially a title like mine. SM: Do you feel like your experience has helped you—I’d imagine that folks who are in the same position as you are more willing to listen and maybe to validate you a bit more? Have you felt that? Like do you feel like your experiences has helped you to empathize with those that you’re communicating with in the community? VF: Sometimes. So to a level, like you know I’ve had some experiences that some of our Hispanic community have had so I’m able to really—through my experiences with them on specific levels, but also just with my mom’s experiences and as an 15 outsider watching that—I get what a lot of the first generation also experiences. But I think, I’m only one person and we serve over eighty-five thousand residents and not all of them have the same experiences that I’ve had. And so it can be a little tricky with that, especially like making sure that you’re not focusing all your attention to one sector of the population and that you’re making sure that you’re being open and accepting and welcoming and inclusive of other communities as well. And so I’m very fortunate that I get to work with the Diversity Commission that also helps me bring that to my attention and my awareness. I definitely feel like this role had like a specific persona, you know with marketing, when they cater to communication needs, they have personas that are like what they envision will buy the product. So I think this position definitely has a persona of what it should look like, because just not anybody could just step into that role and do it. SM: Yeah, I feel like—I’d say that given your experience, you can probably just like relate to people better? I don’t know, do you feel like that’s true or...? VF: I think so. I remember from my interview like the mayor asking me about my resume, I had it put on there that I helped with the Ogden United Promise Neighborhoods, something like that, I don’t remember the name of it—but it was through Weber State and they were helping United Way with that project, and I helped with it, like I knocked door to door in our East Central area and asked parents to take a survey on, you know, early childhood to like career and what that looks like for their children, and so he asked me about that and I think me 16 being able to do that and then putting it on my resume definitely did help make the case that I know more than one experience that live in our community and that makes me capable of connecting with a lot of people. You know, I think it’s been fun. I’ve enjoyed the new people I’ve been able to meet through my job, I’ve enjoyed the different activities that I’ve been able to do because of my job, and just the awareness that I’ve been able to bring to administration because of my job, so I think that’s fun and definitely something that I feel I’ve grown in and been able to build upon. SM: What was your motivation to go into your chosen field? VF: That’s a good question. I sucked at political science so I was like, “Can’t major in that,” and I think the introduction to sociology was the one that kind of attracted my attention. Like thank goodness for, what is it called, like general courses, because seriously I was so focused on, “I’m going to be a political science major,” and I was like, “This isn’t for me, I like it but not that much,” and so, you know, having that exposure definitely did help. So I think that was when I took that class, I remember being like, “Uh, this is my major, like what am I doing?” and then once I started taking like sociology or social deviants and sociology of law and cities and urban life and criminology, and all these courses, I’m like, “I get everything, for one, like how good is that? That’s a great deal for tuition.” I mean, I got an ‘A’ in the class, which just verified that I needed to change my major. But I think that’s when I realized that that was what needed to be my major. And then I think also, just because of the activism and involvement that I 17 had in my community at that time and when I was younger, that just felt like it was more encompassment of what I had to bring to college so far. SM: So following that, what was your motivation to get into your work field? VF: The ability to create policy change. I mean, it’s important to have different perspectives at the policy-making table so that we’re making sure and being aware of everybody’s experiences and how they would be affected through the change. And I think it’s something that most people don’t think of but it’s important to have just, you know, diversity of gender, education, thought, religion, ethnicity. It’s important to have it there because we all see things differently and they affect our communities differently and so if you don’t have the experience that I bring then you only know what you know and who cares about the rest, right? SM: When was there a time that you were brave at work? VF: [laughs] That’s a good question. I think—there are many times that run into my head, but like I said, because of the environment and the makeup of people, what that looks like—I’ll give you this one ‘cause we just talked about it at work. So here in Ogden we have Christmas Village and it’s huge, right? Because it’s like the whole block lights up and there’s cottages and there’s different things in these cottages. But at the same time, those cottages don’t represent our community nor the diversity that exists in our community and that’s very sad. And so last year, in an attempt to remedy some of this situation—there’s Santa’s castle, and in Santa’s castle there is elves, and these elves are like orange, 18 which is not even a real color, skin tone, I don’t know, who knows. And so one of my coworkers was like, “Let’s paint it. You’re the Diversity Affairs Officer, let’s do it,” and I was like, “Okay, let me make some phone calls, talk to some people, blah, blah, blah.” And so went ahead and called people, everybody seemed to be okay with the idea, and when I mean ‘everybody,’ it’s like to the support staff to our senior leadership team. And I ran it past our senior leader in that area that like oversaw that function and he’s like, “Yeah, that’s fine,” he didn’t really give much important to it. Well, the day rolls around, I have my friend, who’s an artist, I’m like, “Let’s go,” they have it open, we go in there and then I got the phone call, they’re like, “Oh, can you just hold? Can you just wait? We’re just a little bit nervous because these are antique elves and this and that, and the beard, like it comes on but it doesn’t come off,” and I was just like, “It’ll be fine, trust me, it will be fine. The elves will be intact. It will be there in one piece, it will be different and it will look so good.” And so we did it, we painted it, you know, we gave it a better tan for lack of a better word, and then the next day, I have the senior leader from that department say, “You did what?” And I was like, “Yeah, I told you about this,” but he didn’t think I was going to move through with the idea, he thought, he was like, “Oh, you know, she’s not going to bother with it”—and that’s the one thing my husband says is my biggest flaw, when people challenge me, it is my goal to make them know that I can do it. Anyways, so he was upset because, “these are antiques,” but I didn’t care because it had been the community’s request, not only once but several times, that Christmas Village does not represent our community. And so if that was 19 something small that I could do and just have an upset senior leader for like a week? I can take that. But I mean, again, going back to the importance of representation, like it is important for our community, and because our community’s demanding it, you should feel it’s important, and I don’t think he saw that at that time. And so, I mean, there’s been many times where I have had to be brave and stand my ground, but I feel like everything I had to stand up for has been okay because I know that the community has wanted it or needed it or has requested it and so I’ll take a beat, I don’t care. Another thing is that I’m too honest to work there so people really...I never bullshit them. SM: Do you feel like in the end it’s worked out for you to just be brave and to go for it? VF: Once I can get over my brain, yeah, because I’ve had many internal battles with myself. I’m like, “How are you going to do that?” like, “You’re not even capable?” like, “What if they say no?” and then that’s when I’m like, “The worst thing they can say is no,” and then it’s fine, like I already knew that was fifty-fifty option. And so again, because I don’t see many people that look like myself in these environments and me being the first one, like trying to lay the path out for whomever wants to come into either my role or another role at that level, it’s hard knowing that, but at the same time I have to make sure that I pave, even if it’s like a footprint, you know, that they can follow. SM: As a woman, how do you define courage? VF: That’s a hard one because women aren’t, at least when I was growing up, you weren’t really taught to be courageous, like you were just taught to go with the 20 flow and to follow the rules and do as you’re told. So I think defining courage for me now is to get out of my head and know that I’m capable of doing the things that I say I can do and so courage for me is just, not listening to that voice that’s like second-guessing yourself. Well, yeah, and just trusting more of your abilities even though you may not—‘cause as a woman, I don’t think we get complimented enough at work, right? Like you’re not told like, “Oh, what a great report,” or like, “Hey, you really knocked that presentation out,” you don’t get told that a lot as a woman in the work field. And I don’t know if it’s because people are afraid of sexual harassment or we don’t know how to compliment women, professional women, in the work environment. But not getting that, I think, plays with your brain and knowing if you’re doing things right or wrong, and so I think just trusting your gut and getting that little voice tuned out and going with what you know. SM: You said that you and your husband balance a lot of the responsibilities at home, did you feel like any issues balancing work and home responsibilities? VF: No. I think I was very fortunate that when I started my job, I was part-time and so I was only allowed to work a certain number of hours a week and so to me, I was like, “Okay, if this is what I’m given, why would I work more,” not that I wasn’t paid, but, “Why would I want to work more than what I was given?” And so I think I’ve always been very good at keeping pockets of my life, so I have like my family-life, I have my work-life, I have my school-life, so I’ve been very good at that. I don’t know if that’s good or bad, I haven’t seen the consequences of that yet, if there are any. 21 So when I became full-time, I stuck to the same method that work is work in this building and home is home here with my husband and our home, wherever we are. So I do once in a while check my email on the weekend but it’s not like I’m looking to work, it’s if there’s anything that I’ve left pending that needs to be addressed I look for it, but that’s it. I’m only at my job when I’m required to be there and I’m at home. And I think that helps with both being mentally sane, for both work and life, but it also helps to establish boundaries. And I think as a woman, we think we have to overwork or work more than we’re required because we have to meet some ideal of some gender role, something, I don’t know, that was established. And I’ve never felt that pressure and I hope never to feel that pressure to have to work more than I need to just to prove myself. But yeah, I think I’ve been very lucky in how I’ve been able to manage this job and everything else. SM: Do you feel like people are more focused on the roles you play in your home over your role as a career woman? VF: So at work, I’ll talk to my coworkers about home if we’re doing something fun but I don’t go into details about it. And then at home, I talk to my husband if there’s like a cool or interesting project or I had a bad day or something. But it’s never like if we go out to public like people ask me about my job, I’ve never had that. Like for example, when my husband introduces me to people he’ll actually say, “She works for the city,” just because he’s so proud and happy of what I do, but it’s not like people ask me, “Oh, do you work” or “Are you a stay-at-home wife?” You know? I don’t think I’ve had people ask me that. I don’t get asked that, I get 22 more of like, “When are you going to have children?” which that question is impossible to address because it’s not like it’s just me, it’s like body and other things, right? But I think a lot of the people that have known me know that I study and I study a lot and so I get more of the question of, “Are you done with school?” So that’s more of the question that I get. People know I have a job. So although I speak both languages I tend to, like church, family, tends to be more Spanish-speaking, like Hispanic culture and Latin American culture, and so for them it’s different. It’s a different type of interaction. So yeah, I get, “When are you going to have children?” you know, “Are you done with school yet?” because I think a lot of people in my culture don’t understand what it is to have a career. When we think of a career we think of like you’re going to be a doctor or you’re a lawyer or you’re like something big that you see in the mainstream. And so when we think of career and you’re like, “Oh yeah, I work for the government,” it’s like, “Oh” [shrugs] “What is that?” And even then, when you try and explain it they don’t get it and so I think that’s why I get more of the questions like, “Are you done with school?” instead of like “What is your career?” because people in my culture don’t understand that there are many careers and that doctors and lawyers are just mainstream careers. SM: So what would you define as ‘women’s work’? VF: There is no definition for women’s work. I think it’s just whatever you’re interested in and passionate about and know you can give it a hundred and ten percent, I think that’s the woman’s work. 23 SM: How do you think women receiving the right to vote shaped or influenced history, your community, and then like you personally? VF: So women getting the right to vote in the 1920s is great but women of color weren’t able to vote until way after that. And so that’s even more crucial because it’s, again, not making it about politics, but noticing the difference between a race and how people of a certain race are treated. If you’re a white woman, you can get to vote in 1920, right? If you’re a black woman? You don’t get that right until, what, thirty years later? And it’s still on going, where women of color get a delayed response to whatever white women get, where that shouldn’t be the case. It should be all women regardless of ability, spoken language, you know, ethnicity, place of birth, you know, we should all get the same rights at the same time. And so it’s great that we get to be involved in our democracy and to vote and to actually speak our mind when it comes to politics or laws or anything that we don’t feel we agree with. But it’s also, knowing that difference in when women got to vote based on race, it also just sheds the light on that we need to be more proactive about being inclusive of all women when we do bring policy to the table. And so I love that I get to vote and I vote every freaking year, regardless if it’s a presidential year or not, because I know how important it is. And I know that if I don’t vote, somebody else gets a say in what happens to me, or my family, or my city, or my community. So, great that we were acknowledged as human beings but I still feel like policy-wise, whether it’s in Utah or in the U.S., there’s a 24 long way to go just to have women and women of color on an equal playing field as men. SS: So with your position, you are the Diversity Affairs Officer, so does that include people of color only, or primarily, or do you also work with women specifically, or LGBTQ, any of that? Is that part of your umbrella as well? VF: Yeah, I work for everybody and anybody that wants to see me and get helped by me, regardless of, you know, if they identify within a diverse group or setting or anything, I’m just there to make government seem like it’s, like you can do it on your own, like you can go to the building and do whatever you need to do there. Just to make it feel like it’s something that people can do.