24 ACORN Prof. Nelson (after dictating about seventy-five words for a spelling contest) "Enough." Irvin Poulter (aside) "Gee, I wish that he realized it." Prof. Nelson (in English) "Before coming to class to tell your story, try it on the dog at home." Billy Baggs (next day) "I didn't have a real dog to try mine on so I tried it on a hot dog." When we went to History class, We thought we'd have a teacher. It was not so, for woe, alas! We found he was a preacher. JENSEN. The Freshmen are very fortunate in getting Joseph Smith as their athletic manager. We have read that when a boy he always outclassed his opponents. Literary Critic "Here's another 'Let us' in this story." Editor "Change it to turnips." If Gladys Peterson was sick would Alma Packer? Jensen "Learn to live." Lind "Live to learn." From Sophomore Exam. "The sea of Galilee is the shape of an oblong circle and the water is so dense that you can walk on it. "Zacharias was stricken dumb as a sign that John the Baptist would be born, and he went home and told his wife about it." From the Freshmen. "The eight witnesses to the Book of Mormon were: Martin Luther, Eli Whitney, Theodore Roosevelt, etc." Wilford W. (talking to his auto). If you could tell what has gone on in you. I would be ashamed to look the world in the face. Fred Massa Picture Framing and Artist's Material ACORN 25 Prof. Nelson "When a new boy comes to school what is the first thing noticed? It might be his nose." (Verde Garner put his hand over his nose.) Mrs. Shurtliff" (in English) "I feel so angry I could burst." If Mrs. Wilson should go out boating would "Woodrow." Prof. Jensen (in Psychology) "Have you ever had a chill when you took a bath? I have both times." Student (in bookkeeping to another student) "What are you on?" (Meaning lessons.) Second Student "On a stool." Soph "What time is it?" Junior "I can not see, because the hands cover the fact of my watch." Mrs. Shurtliff "Mr. Furniss, tell the girls what snakes are." Mr. Furniss "I don't know; I never had them. A FRESHMAN POEM. A Freshman's ambition must be small As they wander through the hall, Throwing chalk at every one, And calling them a son-of-a-gun. Now, when declining years have passed, And they look upon their life at last; "And where are our ambitions?" he asked; That which I had in the Freshman class. Prof. Henderson (in Theology) "Where do you feel most comfortable?" Pauline Malan "In bed." KERN'S CATERING CO. 2459 WASHINGTON AVE. CONFECTIONERY, ICE CREAM and Everything in the Catering Line