6 THE ACORN. WHAT! A DREAM! It was the day of the Sophomore ball. The notices on the bulletin boards read that it would be in the Second Ward Amusement Hall. "Goodness, in the Second Ward! That's where we went last time. I never will forget how pleased I was to find that my new patent leather shoes weren't scratched one bit (?). But the air why there was enough C02 formed to make white lead, had there been perforated cakes of Pb on the wall." "Yes, if there had been perforated window panes, we might have had some 02 without the C." A Ward Hall, that's half as large as the Assembly Hall. This means that four people take up the space that one does in the Study Room. And to dance at that! But never mind, if they still persist in believing that we can do it, we'll prove tonight that it is impossible. The day after the ball, the students came limping to each class. As Jack hobbled along to European History he considered himself a hero to be there, even if he was unpre- pared. How could the early history of Germany interest him? All he could think of was his mutilated toes and dizzy head. He was sick of history any way. He lost all trace of what they were discussing. As he glanced around, he saw his heroine of the night before quietly nodding. (But was May the one who was nodding?) Soon she leaned over on her companion's shoulder sound asleep. Her mouth wide open. Her face pale. A peacful, contented feeling expressed in every feature. The bell rang. The students anxiously waited for her return from dreamland, but Prof. Terry said, "let the poor girl rest." Ah! wad each teacher the giftie gee us To let us sleep when they can see us; It wad frae many a lesson free us And examination, Class was dismissed. Jack hardly cared to go and leave her there; but he was bashful, and the boys pushed him out. Then the girls locked her in. It was just a practical joke, but Jack was so worried that he couldn't go to his noon Algebra class. He must have a THE ACORN. 7 little recreation; he was feeling-drowsy himself. So he went over to the other building. He took a stroll upstairs, then he passed the Domestic Science Department. He knew May wasn't there cooking anything nice, so he didn't go in. He looked at so many other class rooms, departments and shops, that his eyes became tired and he went down to the gymnasium. After pitching the ball to the basket a few times, and excercising- his muscles on the punching bag, he tried the rings. Soon he missed his grasp and fell to the smooth floor with a thud. He awoke with a large bump on his forehead where he had struck the seat. He gazed around bewildered. Then he tried the door. It was locked; where was May? He had left her locked in the room. Was the shoulder that May leaned on only the hard wall? Was it he who had been asleep? Was it he whom the class had locked in? He knocked loudly at the door, someone opened it and politely ushered him into his Algebra class, one half-hour late. Prof. McKendrick gave him two problems to solve. "Why did you slumber, and what did you dream?" He produced the answer, "I slept because I was so tired after that crowded dance; and I dreamed of the new gymnasium." A MERE SLIP OE A GIRL. Along the street she passed so neat, So pretty, charming and so sweet; A mere slip of a girl. To see this girl was quite a treat; But a banana peel disturbed her feet, 'Twas a mere slip of a girl. Ex. G, "Why is a love letter like a lazy dog?" A. A love letter is an ink-lined plane. An inclined plane is a slope up. A slow pup is a lazy dog." Ex. Tommy "Pa, what is the board of education?" Pa "When I went to school it was a pine shingle." Ex He (on porch) If I should attempt to kiss you, would you call for help? She Would you need any?