12 THE ACORN. Prof. McKendrick thinks that the poultry business is very profitable when one half-dozen eggs will buy a ticket for one lecture. Conductor. (On train to Logan.) Hot! Springs! Belnap. Will I have time to take a bath? Conductor. Only to soak your feet. Tracy threatened to Light upon Furness, and Furnass with a Burning sensation about the heart, Ignited with a desire for revenge and told the Principal. "You are a Hot Headed young man," said the Principal to Tracy, "but you are no Match for a Furness, and before you begin to make Light of the subject, you had better turn the damper down." Delphia. Prof. McKendrick had a baby come'to his house list night, and guess what it was. Blanche. I don't know. A boy I guess. Delphia. No. Blanche. Well a girl. Delphia. Ah! Some one told you. Prof. Lind. All the higher animals have well developed mouth organs. Owen. What did you say about the harmonica? Prof. Lind Dr. John Murray was one of the greatest Oceanic Topographists in the world. Saunders Was he an Englishman? Prof. Lind, somewhat confused. No, I rather think he was a native of England. Miss Reast, in English Literature Will you please give me another example of Metri cal Tale, Austin? Wintle "Tom's Old Shanty," by Robert Burns. Prof. McKendrick, in Theology, How many are there here who are absent today? Miss Kerr, in training In referring to a child, never speak of it as "It." We simply wish to drawthe comparison between her and the professor in English who said "A preposition is a very bad word to end a sentence with." Prof. Lind Where do most animals of the sea live? Johnson In the ocean. THE ACORN. 13 Prof.McKay--Quoting Caesar "Let me have men about me that are fat." Just then Prof. McKendrick walkde in and wondered why everybody laughed. Brown wanted to bawl the Deaf and Dumb boys out when the Basket Ball game was over. Chloe Give me the principal parts of "blow." Mary Shall I begin? Chloe--Yes. Mary blowing her nose This is the present tense, putting away handkerchief, this is the past tense. Preparing to blow again, this is the future tense, and Chloe That's enough. Cragun and Jones have become very accomplished lovers since they've been on the stage. They have learned the wonderful lesson of a fond squeeze. We congratulate the Gold and Blue for their lively paper and especially for the way they spoke of "our boys" on their Athletic page. The Crimson has not yet congratulated the W. S. A. for taking their subscription agent, '04, for our commercial instructor, The Basket Ball boys are proud of the girls of '05, who entertained them and their friends from Logan, at a luncheon after the game. The students are looking forward to the lectures to be given next Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, by Albert Armstrong. WHAT WOULD YOU THINK If the library should be kept in order? If the business manager of the Acorn should do some thing for the interest of the paper? If the students in the rear of the hall should remain in order? If all students should be in their seats at 8:55? If the choir members should forget to cover their faces with their books? If we should have another selection from the orchestra? If Victor Chugg should forget to take his customary daily walks through the halls? If the band should forget to play while the students are taking examinations? If all the desks in the rear of the hall should not be torn up? If we should have a larger hall in which to hold our dances? If students would not take books from others' desks without permission? If we should see a new foundation in the adjoining lot?