24 THE ACORN Alumni Notes The Alumni of any institution ought to be the strongest factor of the school. They should be more enthusiastic than the present student body because they realize more fully what the school stands for and what she is accomplishing. Their love should be stronger than the love of the Board of Education or any others connected with her because she has done everything for them. There is not a doubt but that all students who are indebted to the school for the foundation of their education feel this love, but too often they fail to express it. Why not show onr enthusiasm by doing all we can for the Acorn, by supporting the lecture course, by attending all the dancing parties that are given, by coming to the basket ball games, and by visiting the school often? The school is growing rapidly and the Alumni Association has every reason to be proud of it; but if we do not keep in touch with events we will forget that we have an Alma Mater. Why not keep in touch with her through the Alumni Department of the Acorn? We wish every member of the association would write something for this paper. The class of '08 has certainly fur- nished its share of missionaries and school teachers. Out of the twenty-eight that graduated, there are nine on missions and nine teaching. William S. Wright, Clarence Wright, Raymond Becraft, and William Driver are in Germany. Charles Owen is laboring in New York. Walter Wilson and Leonard Bingham are preaching to the people in Great Britain. William Ellis is in Japan. Vivian Hollands and Frances Poulter are teaching in Roy. George Hooper Hooper. William Shaw West Warren Mina McFarland Huntsville. Sarah Tracy North Ogden. Myron Wade Summit County. Beatrice Barnes Piedmont, Wy Well Faun, there is one consolation, in Heaven there is no weeping; not even the kind made to order. All in favor of a bigger and better Acorn will make it manifest by subscribing now. Residents near Madison and 27th St. have heard a peculiar bugle call lately. What is it? Oh, it's only THE ACORN 25 "Stew" playing "Love Taps" to the order of his "Amazon Vera". Freshmen take notice There is a sale on Mellens, Food at Driver's. The Chemical laboratory is excellently equipped; and the students are taking an active interest in performing their experiments. Of what could Miss Rolapp be thinking in English Literature when she said : "I thought you said satires were love poems"? Sh-h-h. It's a secret that the Juniors are going to give a character ball. Prof. Harker (explaining a drawing on the board): Here is the ocean covered with water. Neither a borrower nor a lender be when it comes to the Acorn. Freshman: John, let me take your Acorn. J. Browning: You can get one of your own for fifteen cents. Some readers of "Chaucer's Prologue" are now suffering with literary indigestion. First Student (Eng. Lit.): How do you get such good pronunciation for your words in "Chaucers' Prologue"? Second Student: Oh, I just say 'em the worst way I can and it generally comes out all right. Dear Santa Claus: We have plenty of playthings this Christmas, so will you please bring us a nice big, fat, large "bawl out" for a bad man named Mr. Davis. Your little friends, Mabel and Victor. Bro. Mills: Treseder, if you make that ungainly noise you had better cultivate a more gentle yawn Don't you be what you aint, Just you be what you is; If you am not what you are, Then you is not what you is. If you're just a little tad-pole, Dont you try to be a frog; If you've only just the tail Then dont try to wag the dog. Pass the plate if you cant exhort and preach. If you're just a little pebble, Dont you try to be the beach. When a man is what he isn't, Then he isn't what he is; And as sure as I'm a-talkinJ, He's a-going to get his. A Toast. Distance lends enchantment to the view. Our Faculty WANTED: Someone to take them to dances. Apply to Senior Boys. Miss Kuntz: Give the inflections of teeth Clark: Teeth, tooth, and false teeth.