As for long harangues (lectures to you), they should take up from 70% to 90% of the classroom period, depending on the subject. You can flap your jaws during the remainder of the hour. One teacher thinks that the lecture should be "informal enough to be interrupted by students wishing to ask questions." Another tells us that "some of the newer methods are class discussion of a problem or of reports, with class criticism. These are much more useful to some than lecture methods which so predominate today." If your Weber workout is to be entirely successful, teachers recommend that you make out a time schedule, one that not only budgets study time, but allows space for "some kind of activity in which you are not the passive receiver, but a participant." Maybe elementary training is at fault here, but you "should learn how to read faster and better." Leave the comics alone and read "non-fiction, challenging books in addition to required classroom reading." Teachers urge you to "think accurately" and to "establish an objective and stick to it . . . keeping in mind that whatever you learn is going to be useful sometime in your life." Teachers believe you're not all knuckleheads. They know that under the hardpan lies a substratum of pay dirt. They are willing to put the tools of the prospector in your hands, but teachers are peculiar they expect you to do the digging. When asked for their ideas about parents, Weber students responded with the following: Nature has produced many freaks, but she outdid herself when she created parents. Of all the obstacles contrived to thwart youthful yearnings for a "full life and free," parents take the cake. Their restrictions, admonitions and prohibitions are a half-Nelson, headlock and body scissors all at the same time. So you think. Their ideas are always at variance with yours. Mother knows that what you are wearing is not adequate protection against the weather. Father, who thinks Ava Gardner is a knockout in a strapless evening gown, hits the ceiling the first time you sport one. On the subject of sleep, parents are most unreasonable. If it is as indispensable to good health as they maintain, why don't they try some themselves instead of staying awake until the young'uns are in?. And don't they know that the post-midnight hours are the best for study? By golly, if you have dawdled away the forepart of the evening, you've just got to buckle down then if you are to be prepared tomorrow. You can always catch up on your sleep in class. Parents are always urging you to aim higher, work harder, shoot straighter, as if they thought "Excelsior" was more than a boys' club. "My mother nag, nag, nags about the same old things," moans one distracted coed. "She's always finding fault. She's never satisfied." But should one word of censure be uttered by another, mother ruffles up her feathers and flies to the defense of her disparaged offspring. Parents are inconsistent, to say the least. And they always think you're good looking. On that score you are willing to acknowledge their superior judgment. Parents are quaint. They are as old fashioned as the bustle and the handlebar mustache. Being a product of the past they know nothing of the present, and yet they hold themselves up as interpreters of manners, morals and current events. They are always harking back to the "good old days" and comparing the snap the kids of today have with the rigors of their own youth. "My dad believes that the younger generation is going to the dogs and will never amount to anything," confides one Weberite. "No matter what happens to me, things were always harder, colder and tougher when he was young." When it comes to dates, parents really let go with the fireworks. "They can't find anyone good enough for us to go around with," complains one fellow. "They are never happy about our dates." "Each new boy friend must be carefully inspected and given the critical eye of approval before he is allowed to call upon my parents' charming daughter," volunteers a girl. "He practically has to submit an autobiography and four references before he is allowed to date." If you should stay out past the deadline parental wisdom has decreed, the consequence makes the punishments of the Spanish Inquisition puny in comparison. No car next time! Students concede that nothing alters the status quo of a married couple as quickly and completely as the advent of a child. Presto! From two normal, blithesome individuals they turn into beings with Purpose, Responsibilities, Obligations. Woe to any subversive influence that tries to prevent mastery of their new role! Mother haunts the lecture halls, the book stores and public libraries. She identifies herself with church, community and civic groups and the P. T. A. You might as well save the sass and take it sitting down when she launches into one of her righteous little diatribes. Having charted her course she's not going to let you thwart her determination to graduate magna cum laude. She has a wealth of scientific and practical truth and experience. She has a job to do, and by golly, she's going to do it. It wasn't so many years ago that dad snapped on the side curtains, backed out the Model T and vibrated off for his first heavy date with mom. Those were the carefree days. Now, he has you on his hands and conscience, and those considerations that contribute to or detract from your wellbeing, present and future, are uppermost in his mind. Having seen a lot of turbulent water go under the bridge, over the dam and down the gutter, he's pitching with you now in the chaotic present. Your problems are his and you can't shake him. Parents, interviewed for their opinions of students, say they believe that since you are chips off the old blocks, naturally, "you're smart." They know that "little is impossible for you if you'll get up a full head of steam." Being right here in the Weber boiler works, you don't waste much time, but some wonder if your teachers are "demanding all you've got." Maybe they don't let on, but parents agree that a little social mishmash and a fair sprinkling of sports and special activities are "good things along with the solid stuff." Bit by bit, your life at Weber is "developing you socially and mentally," and they're pleased with that. They know that when you leave here you will be a more stable, responsible, better equipped individual than when you entered. Parents aren't opposed to dates. Since "dating is an accepted part of our social behavior," they'd have your head examined if you took no interest in the opposite sex. They don't like dates though, that "interfere with your studies during the week, or that leave your mind owly in the morning." And they may raise the roof when a week-end date keeps you out until the cock crows. Dating has at least one accepted function, although perhaps a theoretical one: to develop the faculty of discrimination, so that when it comes to choosing a lifetime mate, you won't be left holding the bag. Parents believe that "you can have fun without waiting at the scene until the last." The emotional windup that tightens as the hours advance may well snap the mainspring. The prize package that seems so irresistible at three a. m. can be a booby trap. If your crush of the moment doesn't know when to call it quits, tell him you've got to get some shut-eye so that you won't look like an old bag the next time he sees you. He'll lap up the subtle flattery. And if your Juliet of the evening is disinclined to say "when," propel her to her front door and tell her to scat. Gals go for the masterful type. This, the thinking of your parents. Parents are queer all right. They like you to play ball their way once in awhile. 24 THE COLLEGE BOOK STORE SUPPORTS STUDENT ACTIVITIES