A DECLARATION of INDEPENDENCE OF The Royal Barber Shop 207 Twenty-Fourth Street UP-TO-DATE Mem'ry shows life's sunny springtime with its golden yesterdays, When life's autumn settles o'er you with its magic-lantern gaze. Friends may come today to cheer you, and tomorrow they may go; Let them drift along, unheeded-class them neither friend nor foe. Friends tell you what you should have done, "but now it is too late." When you need their kindly service, "Oh, we haven't time to wait!" If they speak, politely answer them or pass the time of day; If they don't pay no attention, you are just as good as they. Do not weep because some big IT has has given you a slight. If such worries rack your brain, you'll lose sleep and appetite. If tie's too refined to walk with you, why let him walk alone- You're not asking help of him-you're big enough to hold your own. Let the past with all its troubles fade like Sodom and Gommorrah; Seek the best today-you'll find the future has enough of sorrow. Yes, of course, there are exceptions, but let sense and reason blend: You're not always classed a sucker when you help along a friend. We are here to earn a welcome and to treat the public right- Not to sell the ancient gold brick and to watch the suckers bite. We are here and at your service-getting pay for work, well done. Just drop in, and we will give to you a first class job or none. All our workmen are professionals-the finest in the town. We can easily prove it if you perchance to call around. So when you come this way we all would like to have you stop. We are here on Twenty-fourth street, at the Royal Barber Shop. -Walter Emmett. ALWAYS THE SAME - HAIRCUTTING 25 CENTS; SHAVING 15 CENTS Didn't Know "What are the wild bells saying, my love?" "I don't know, dear, I don't speak their language." LADY (intent on obtaining new novel)- Have you "The Soul of a Bishop?" WALT-I-er-don't know, madam. I've never given the matter any thought. "Speaking of bathing in famous springs," said the tramp to the tourist. "I bathed in the spring of '86. Russ-Where did Noah strike the first nail in the Ark? JONES-On the head. Our collar work cannot be excelled. Finished and Rough Dry our specialty Visit Our Plant and See How Your Laundry Work Handled 2149-53 Royal Avenue Phones 367 and 368 Culley Says Weber! You have always sought for the best, because the truest instincts of educa- tion can lead nowhere else. Call again! Culley Drug Company All Profs Are Against Us "Whatcha studyin'?" "Sor oology." "Hard?" "N' very." "How many cuts y' y' 'lowed?" "Never calls za roll." "Lotsa mid terms?" "Never gives any." "Dutside readin' and writin'?" "Nope. "Called en offen?" "About once a week." "Thought there was a string to it." GOLDEN RULE STORES OGDEN, UTAH Scientists are getting nitrates out of the air, but the Western Union has been getting night rates out of people for years.