To The Herald To "Axel" Greaves and Gary Neville I sing a hymn of praise. These scabs did slave and sweat for nil The Herald to upraise. They strained and heaved - this couple, (Not literally, of course) And I must admit they done dang well Their paper bloomed perforce. And now my thanks I must express To these dodo - dearborn doaks, For the space they gave me in their sheet To advertise my "crummy" oaks. But after all, a spade's a spade Hence, Greavesy is a Greek. His Pollack satch if in a glade Would shame Dame Nature's freaks. He scooped a scoop one morning About the Jones' Cement, And with some pictures he did make A laughing stock of two young gent. Fie on him - twas all in fun Until this cinereous crone, Did smooth like ooze and leave us Alone in court to moan. Now, I like this hircine hippo Less scintillating trickacy, Eut for that nassy, nassy scoop I yearn to boot his bumbassidy! "Norgie" Aadnesen is awful nice, But 10 points colder than supercooled Yet with her charm and natural way, She takes a poor guy's breath away. If only she wouldn't conglaciate, A million men would try to rate. Heavy (like lead or Fat Riley) Rumor: Rowland (Grimace) Corry swears he only went Gaddy over one guinea in all his wanderings Some broad from Garland, no doubt.