On Fellows and Flowers My dear readers, in the dictionary the definition of man reads: one possessed of manly attributes; while the definition for the flower reads: a figure or ornamental expression. Thus comes the comparison, for is a man over satisfied without his tie correctly tied, or without his hair combed, so the weaker sex will be drawn by his beauty, In the same way is a flower always putting on the dog. This comparison will be proved in three issues. First will be the comparison of man to a lily. Men glory in sitting down to a meal and gorging themselves with food; then for the good old newspaper, which, after half reading he somnambulizes (sleeps) both long and loud. As the old adage goes, "He who sloops lazily and knows he sleeps lazily is dead (to tho world)". Put a lily in his hand! That accounts for the lily. Now for the second issue, the comparison of man to a Narcissus. You might remember that the ancient man called Narcissus was the embodiment of self conceit. As the story goes, Farcy (for short) was thirsty one day and he looked into the water before getting a drink, whereupon he saw his own image. He immediately fell in love with himself, which is exactly like those men of today, for do they not stand in front of a mirror for hours and comb their hair, end then' very gently and tenderly press the big long, flowing waves into their beautiful locks, Whoops my dear! Just like those men! Forget not the second part of the old adage, "He who is conceited and knows he is conceited, he is a Narcissus." Squelch him!!! And now for my third issue, the relation (?) of man to a pansy (pan'zi). The dictionary gives it as the hearts case. But those men all think of themselves as the answer to a maiden's prayer. Oh pray, why don't they think of that inevitable Enemy, Halitosis (unpleasant breath) or of the fact that, all in all, their best friends won't tell them! This issue covers much ground because all men are pansies, and though pansies were once a favorite flower of the garden, (for decoration only), they gradually wore their welcome out (hint) until they are now but pests (another hint). And now for the last part of the adage, "He who is a pansy and knows he is a pansy, he must be dumb!" Shoot him! Revolvers are sold at all sporting good stores (mid advertisement). Someone must have nipped chivalry when it was but a rosebud, and they must have forgotten to water politeness, as far as the present day man goes (for girls?) This, my dear readers, is as plain as the flower in your buttonhole. For are not flowers and trees related, and did not Hemlock kill Socrates, Sneerirgly, Ellamay Host Women And Posies Without opposition there can be no progress. This battle of the sexes must go on, but in this day and age who wants a "poppy"? With this introduction, there creeps into my mind the thought that we may treat the subject of women as one large class of flowers. Think of the orchid, gentlemen, as rare as the "ten virgins, five of whom foolishly carried no oil in their vessels, but tarried with their wicks trimmed to wait the arrival of the bridegroom." (Matthew 25: 1-2). As rare as a dainty buffalo chip that coyly turns up its yellowed edges at the haughty disdain of the less aromatic vegetation surrounding it. Yes, we may say that it is very rare; consequently, the price of one of these blooming flowers must go up. But what happens when one gives the purchase price? They wither and the leaves fall-one by one to give warning to those that follow - never be an orchid. We may then say that a "good" woman is like a good orchid; hard to find, they cost a lot when you do find them, and they soon lose their luster, to fade and die. Others may be likened to the water lily which holds its head proudly above the surface of the slimy pool in which bull frogs frolic and play. But when someone grasps it by its delicate petals and pulls it from the brackish water of the stagnant pool, what does one see but leeches writhing in the muck surrounding its roots? As the orchid, this flower soon fades, its petals becoming wrinkled and unsightly when lifted from the slime that stimulated it to its zenith of beauty. Now, because we may invariably change from types of flowers to types of women, let us next dwell upon the tapeworm type of women who snuggle up to the lad with a wad of cash, flirt with him, fee with him, fool with him and forget him. Yes, you've guessed it: the goold old ingingclay inevay that clasps a manly frame with clinging arms, honeys every conceivable favor from the stalwart oak, leaving it a broken windfall. Just keep the above thoughts in mind - think what I could do with the Morning Glory, the Buttercup, the Dandelion, or even the Sweet Pea. It behooves me great pain not to be able to elaborate on this last one, so I will but say, "Don't be a snap dragon". Jay Said the husky spider to the fly, "Ahoy thar, mate, here's mud in your eye." Likewise this our profs oft do Then smile as over tests we stew. Indian term of disgust - "Ugh!"