25 ACORN Waiter "What portion of the chicken do you want, Mr. Barker?" Bro. Barker "All but the neck, please!" Ex. Overheard in the Ark. The elephant to the ant "Aw, quit your shoving." Ex. Mr. A. "What do you know about it, someone took me for Admiral Dewey!" Mr. B. "That's nothing, last week someone took me for higher than that." Mr. A. "Did they take you for Theodore Roosevelt?" Mr. B. Nope, higher than that." Mr. A. "The President himself?" Mr. B. "Nope. Someone tapped me on the shoulder very kindly and said, 'Mein Gott! is it you?' " Ex. Poor little Ray has lost his heart, But he knows where to find it, Leave it alone, and it will come home. Delia close behind it. Ruth Sears in Public Speaking class was to speak on a bumble bee. In conclusion she said: "I'm afraid if you expect a speech on the bumble bee, you'll get stung." "Let me look inside your watch?" "I'd rather not." "Why not?" "There's a girl in the case." Ex. Bro. Wilson "Where are you going to get your plots for your stories?" Pete Kasius-"Up stairs." Bro. Wilson "Well we generally do get them from the attic." Sadie Eccles in Public Speaking "Electricity is used for shocking purposes." Wilson "Say El da, why do you want your heart tested, you have no heart." Elda (much astonished) "Why, Bro. Wilson, what do you mean?" Wilson "I mean someone else has it." ACORN 26 A rather fleshy student, Took a journey down the stairs. And as soon as he got started Pie began to say his prayers. For the way in which he traveled As everybody knows, Was not upon his dainty feet, But rather on his nose. Alta "Delia what kind of powder do you use? Delia "Oh, I don't know. Its some that mamma has had in the house for sixteen and a half years and now I have grown up to it." Prof. Wilson in English "I forgot my role this morning. Any who are not here please smile." Winters (to jailor) "Put me in cell 49." Jailor "What for?" Winters "It's the one father used to have." Bro. Pardoe (in Public Speaking) "Sister Brown you may talk on the blackboard." Freshman Listen to the music. Soph Music, that's the double quartette. Ben Young, finishing speech "The coat is worn everywhere." Bro. Pardoe "No, no, Bro. Young, on your back." Frank Richards (in Public Speaking) "I presume chocolate cake is made of the same materials as other cakes, only the taste on the top is different." Brother Wilson made a plan That every maid and every man Should try a plot or joke devise That might for publication vie. And so with care we began the task. But what's the use I'd like to ask, For the Acorn can't use all this "stuff," And Esther will soon call "Good nuff." But to that paper I dedicate this verse And may they take it, bad or worse.