ae eu “Home is where we realize most -and sometimes least!" Mrs. Thayne i. Smith ciaims that hyperactivian also be treated with proper ls. He said that large amounts of gr in the blood result in an overduction of insulin. The insulin deracts the sugar, reducing the od sugar to below normal levels. me that occurs the brain is deprivWeofnecessary nourishment. 7 PSnith said that hyperactive Wiliren are unable to disregard said. “Even though there are some things I can't control, like my circumstances, I like to think I can control my responses to those cir- cumstances. And maybe in that home, as our children come and go, I can control what we are to each other a little bit.” "Our challenge is to give our children a feeling for having had a home; having a chance to come home; being part of something big- sractions and have very short atntion spans. “It's incredible what @re doing to these kids," he said, glaining that a child's brain needs ee times the energy of an adult -‘Wai most of them are not even get- 2 te za good breakfast." am--and that, I firmly believe, is my real home." rt treatment. He said good nutrition is the best surance that children will be able aluing a Family Process" was the topic of Dr. Margaret Edward Arcus of the University of British Columbia. ido their best. "Nutrition could be fe wonder drug of the 80's,” Smith She quoted a recent study printed in Psychology Today which indicated . that many of the respondents told little white lies and cheated on exams, expense accounts and income taxes, took home office supplies and even deceived their best friend about important things. "Some felt guilty, others didn't. In this survey it was very clear that many people were violating their very own standards of behavior." she said. Dr. Arcus explained that families are not only the first but also one of the most important agents for value mma Lou Warner Thayne, Salt Lake City poet and mstructor at University of Utah, ked about what it takes to make a me. development and value socialization of its members. And although She said that on a recent trip to vuope her 24-year-old daughter farnilies carry that responsibility for sick". value socialization, [began thinking what would it be be homeless -- not to have gmeplace to be home sick for. fhat makes that in our lives?" she uestioned. she thinks there are very few precise guidelines to carry out this task. “Particularly this is true at‘a time now when we have very rapid social change,” she continued. "What does it take to have a house be a sort of place that makes us and early 20's. nother recognized authority n families to address the Families Alive Conference was Dr. Matti Kibrick Gershenfeld, who is on the faculty of both Temple and Penn State Universities. She is author of seven books, is the president of her own consulting firm, a licensed psychologist and cofounder and president of the Couples Learning Center in Philadelphia. For the past several years she has been involved in research dealing with women and depression of the 35-45 year old syndrome. Dr. Gershenfeld said that because of the quick change in our culture over the past few years, women are often being raised in one culture and living in another. She said that the majority of women are employed full-time, and that as womens' roles change, men also go through a transition, resulting in a general ambiguity about how the two sexes relate in a marital setting. Claiming that these changing roles have had a dramatic effect on the family and the increasing divorce rate, she quoted statistics which show that 40 per- 500 percent increase in alcoholism; try suicide eight times more often com- "Valium has superseded aspirin as the most-used drug in America." 5 Iwmething to come home to?" — She said that values must be learned, where the values are dealing with ethics or morality. Children learn their conduct by modeling and identification -- right or wrong. of the Family Psychology Training Program at Georgia State University and supervisor of the American Assn. of Marriage and Family Therapists. Dr. L'Abate explained that the saying “You only hurt the one you love" is true, because if we did not care about someone we would not be hurt by their actions. he opposite of love is not hate," he said. If you have hate you still care because you have an emotion. "The opposite of love is - indifference,” he explained. He said that sometimes married couples will inevitably fight. "When they fight at least they still have emotion, but when they stop caring enough to fight, watch out,” he said. The couple explained to a large learn to be intimate. He defined intimate as being able to express ones hurts and fears of being hurt. Dr. L'Abate separated “being physical” from “intimacy.” He said . Dr. Gershenfeld continued that women are being provided with more job opportunities and freedom, but they are also suffering from a "Eighty percent of women afety, something to cling to, band, Dr. Luciano L'Abate, director over 15 years. plain of depression," she said. Ysmething to bubble about -- in the “Intimacy” workshop conductec ducted jointly by her and her hus- group at the conference that one of therapy more often than ever before. She mentioned that everyone of us eeds a place where we feel loved nd we all need somewhere to put dur roots. ‘How do we do it so there will be is inevitable in a loving relationship that you will cent of current divorces are among couples who have been married than men; smoke more; and are in le happy with longing to be there?” ‘Tread in one place that between he hours of four and nine in most “Mhomes, 80 percent of the exchange isnegative,” she continued. the home, family, etc., before they have resolved the self centered issues encountered in the late teens hurt and be hurt,” said Mrs. L'Abate mblems, but instead turn to drugs idshe was “home outward centered, concerned about find a place that says come here, come home." safe, I'm okay because I know who I gined to use nutrition as the qwer to medical or psychological al “Morality and ethics are not concerned with what customs or laws or edicts are -- but with what they ought to be,” she concluded. falls down in a mid-life crisis," Gershenfeld said. She said most of the problem lies in faulty perceptions of adult development. Women try to become | is the thing we carry, like coins in a pocket, that says wherever Iam I'm $mith said that doctors are not wa people do it that way, she said. world completely different from today's world. "When the woman gets 35 to 45 years old she feels like she has been building a house of cards and it all with a whole lot of people or by themselves, I hope they'll never be homeless. I hope they'll be able to "Maybe the best way to do it is to find home within themselves. To know that that is the real home, that Mai il. aa Ci) When asked what one ought to do, some people may refer to whatever is customary or established practice. One ought to do a particular thing the way it has always been done before or because most ger than themselves. "But whether they eventually live WNo teacher should be required to ha kid who didn't bring his min to school,” Smith smiled jing that if children have cold weal for breakfast, by the time get to school their blood sugar wel has fallen to a point where it eomes very difficult for them to k On et peed ees? She said the problem is that women don't know how to use their new found freedoms. They made their decisions on what their lives will be, Dr. Gershenfeld said, but they made those decisions in a the most important, but one of the. most difficult tasks in life, is to that being intimate requires understanding and caring, but that sometimes people do terrible things like molest and beat on each other or even kill each other while being physical. “Being physical doesn't have all that much to do with being intimate," he added. _ He explained that couples who do not have intimacy have more physical ailments and psychomatic symptoms than couples who have learned how to really talk and understand each other. Page 3