Confidence Man (cont' d) "Have you slipped on the feed bag yet?" Nick asked . "huh?" "I said "have you eaten yet'?" "Oh, Nope ." "Neither have I," replied Nick. "Want to come with me?" "Might jest as well," drawled the farmer. "I don't reckon that I could find a good place all by myself." "Good Lord," thought Nick, "I'll bet that's more words than he's said in one "breath since he was born." "Suppose we walk down the street a little," suggested Nick. "There's a snappy little hash house where you can get a steak as thick as a London fog and a cup o' java as black as your hat in a jiffy, and they only soak you four bits." "By the way," continued Nick, "what do you do for a living?" It was all that he could do to keep from laughing when he said that. "Why he hasn't combed the hay-seeds from his hair for months," he said to himself. "I own a farm," replied the farmer. "What's your occupation?" The question caught Nick completely off guard. "Why I'm a--a-- barber." Nick stuttered. "Yeah, a barber." "Here's the joint," spoke Nick in a relived tone of voice. "Jump a stool. I've got something to say to you." "What'll you have?" growled the waiter. "A steak that's thick and a cup of coffee that's so strong it can walk alone. What's yours?" "I'll take the same," replied the farmer. "Now look," began Nick, "about five years ago I bought five hundred shares of oil stock, and my mother is sick and needs an operation right away; now I--" That was as far Nick got before he was interrupted by a loud gale of laughter, "Why son, if I were to pool all my cash, I wouldn't have enough to but leggins for a gnat. In fact I came to New York to borrow money from my brother to pay off the mortgage on ray farm. Ha Ha Ha Now if that's all you wanted, I'll be on my way. " "Well, how do you like that?" said Nick to himself. "He not only didn't buy ray oil stock, but he left me with the check to nay. I wouldn't mind that so much only my steak was about as appetizing as a yesterday's pancake; and my coffee was as cold as Mahatma Gandi in a rumble seat. " I wonder what time it is. I've got to get back to the station and pick me up another farmer." "Good Lord! that guy has stolen my watch'." Floyd Seager