COMMENTce —_ la _ oe —— March 1979 (USPS 791-360) times Weber State College Alumni Association 5 yt wy, x ee = PRON a ce FE ds Y 1889-1979 90th anniversary for Weber Pages 4, 5 Memories of Moench Page 6 Utah climate Page 2 Page3~ Africa - developing nation < SA als “Hedoenin _ “ a e 5S 4s js en “ia ee ae = &> yak ok ~ ie ‘ =. 96 er Ae : Se Soe Be BX at gee ¥ < + e s we * one “Wie . a“ Meet - two institutional council members Page 8 6 ~\ y feelings according to research conducted by Dr. Frank Apolonio, assistant professor, Child and Family Studies. He used fifth grades students in Florida and measured their levels of self-esteem against their perceptions of their parents. “We can think of self-esteem as based on four major sources: competence, significance, virtue and power,’’ said Dr. Apolonio. Competence is that feeling of ablity to cope. Significance comes from being treated by “important others” in a way that allows children to see themselves as being loveable and worthwhile. The feeling of “‘virtue’’ comes when a child has a personal set of standards of what’s right and wrong and abides by those standards. Power is the sense of control of one’s own life-the feeling of “TI to about me and my hap- make own ac- tivities.”’ Dr. Apolonio pointed out that these are the pillars upon which self-esteem is built and parents can use these principles with their children. Research revealed that both the mother and father are important in building a child’s self-esteem and have significant contributions to make. Children who had high self- esteem had parents who reinforced them in the following Parents can’t always meet a need instantly but ...must set a time when a problem can be dealt with. Children can be realistic in their expectations of parents as long as some specific time is scheduled and then Kept. @Give “catch” positive the feed-back child doing and the right things, being cooperative and good, and let him or her know. Don’t get caught in negative response cycles, finding only that which they are doing wrong to comment on. ways. Are you reinforcing your children in these same areas? @ Acceptance and warmth, sometimes referred to as love, is the foundation. It was discovered that a father’s supporting warmth, love and tenderness are equally important for both boys and girls selfesteem. Specific instances eited by students were “my parents teach me things I want to know,” “they are there when I need them and responsive.”’ “They don’t say I’m too busy.”’ @uHave clear rules and standards. Research indicates it’s not permissive parents but parents with clearly stated standards who are most effective. Be firm and consistent but not harsh or punitive. Children who had self-esteem had parents who were:low in * punishment. Children with low self-esteem had parents who were very physically punishing, frequently slapping, hitting and rejecting them. Punishing negatively affects both boys and girls but girls with a mother who is seen as highly punishing have particularly low self-esteem. Parents need to focus on the wrong behavior-not the personality of example, the child, for ‘‘Hitting hurts’’ “You’re a mean rather than child!”’ @Have a general democratic spirit in the home where a child feels he has some control over what’s happening. They need a voice in decision-making that affects their own acitivities. This doesn’t mean children are telling their parents what they are going to do but there is a mutual participation in reasoning and deciding together. Children then feel they have some control. It’s not a “do whatever you want”’ nor is ita ‘“‘do as I say”’ but a middle ground where the result is mutually acceptable. This also cultivates communications which should ~ pening decisions is - what 0 Parents play a significant role in the development of such influence be open and to hear respectful. @ Listen. Be willing children out even if what they say isn’t what you would like to hear. Children should be (continued on page 2) Sa whatever life presents me?” can nn How does a child develop a high level of self-esteem and acquire the attitude of ‘‘I can do i’ and ‘I can cope with —_. =< eine I’m OK, your OK, how’s your child?